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	<title>okcupid</title>
	<link>https://okcupid.wodemo.net/</link>
        <item>
        <title><![CDATA[Being Her Center Of Gravity]]></title>
		<link><![CDATA[https://okcupid.wodemo.net/entry/538005]]></link>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[@okcupid]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 01 Oct 2021 02:52:40 -0700]]></pubDate>
        <description><![CDATA[
So I was riding with a chick on Saturday, when she said that I make her feel nervous. Not uncomfortable nervous, but nervous as in she’s always worrying about what I will think of her. She’s a hot girl and constantly has men hitting on her, but she said that I was the only guy that ever makes her feel the way that I do (nervous). Now, in the past I’ve posted about how another girl said something very similar when I asked her why she would never look me in my eyes. And Sex Lips, Mahal (the feminist, I might add), and several other women said the same thing about feeling nervous around me.

Noticing that this occurs with every girl that I date, I think I should put up a post on some of the things that I do to make them feel that way. The only way I can describe what they feel is that of being around someone that is important and in high authority, which is where I want to start. I’d say that the first thing the girls I date notice, is how much other people respect me, and when they see that other people respect you, they fall into line and respect you as well. If you’re treated like a loser or someone unimportant by other people, they in turn treat you the same way.

The next thing I believe that has a big effect on how the women I date feel about me, is the way I make comments about them. I do a lot of balancing. For instance, if a girl is wearing something I don’t like, has her hair the wrong way, etc., I let her know that I don’t like it. But at the same time, as not to come off as a complete asshole just to be an asshole, I also compliment them on what I do like. And what this does, is set women up to always be wondering what I will think of them. Guys who compliment everything all the time tend to deliver diluted compliments that don’t mean much to women because they’re so predictable and they don’t sound very genuine.

I think that being a quiet confident guy also has a dramatic effect on the mature women that I date. I’ve always been a guy that doesn’t say much. These women know that I’m not shy, because I do tend to speak exactly what’s on my mind whenever I feel like it. And what this does, is keep women in a state of suspense. I do a lot of talking with my eyes, and almost every woman that has one on one time with me says that she is constantly trying to figure me out because I don’t say much. They don’t know whether I like them, am completely in love with them, or if I want nothing to do with them.

I just talk slow, say little, and make every word count. And there are times when I don’t even respond, or I take my jolly ol’ time responding to questions and comments directed towards me. At other times, I completely change the topic right in the middle of a conversation just because I feel like it. And this sets me up as the one that is in control of the conversation.

The most dramatic thing that I do with the women that I date, that I believe other guys don’t do, is that I have a habit of making people see how stupid they look by placing a mirror in front of their face. For instance, when Sex Lips was walking at a distance away from me, I rubbed it in her face by making fun of what she was doing and turning her behavior into a joke. I also very rarely argue with women. When they try to argue with me or if I feel that they‘re overreacting, I won’t respond, and it makes them feel stupid. It’s as if I’m saying ‘you aren’t even worth my time’.

This isn’t everything, but they are some of the major components that contribute to making women feel the way they feel when they’re around me. You just gotta be the center of gravity in their lives. When she has more gravity than you, then she’s the one that you’re going to revolve around. You gotta have enough gravity to make her revolve around you, and the above is how you maintain it.]]></description>
    </item>
        <item>
        <title><![CDATA[7 Signs That A Woman Likes You]]></title>
		<link><![CDATA[https://okcupid.wodemo.net/entry/536916]]></link>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[@okcupid]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate><![CDATA[Tue, 27 Apr 2021 07:06:16 -0700]]></pubDate>
        <description><![CDATA[It’s lunch at a local café, a night in the bar or Saturday on the beach. You’ve seen a girl that you like, perhaps you even exchanged a few words, and now you want to know if she’s even interested before you suggest that you go on a date?





Or you went on a first date, and you’re curious if she really meant it, when she said she’d love to go out again?

So how can you know if she is really interested? Surprisingly, sometimes words can be tricky, and the real answer is hidden in her body language. So here are the signals and clues you should be looking for, to really understand her intents:
The Look In Her Eyes
When She’s Interested: She will look at you with a kind of shy eye contact, while holding her eyes looking slightly down and raising her eyebrows. For some occasions, she will also hold long eye contact with you, to indicate that she’s interested.

This technique of looking down creates the feeling of shyness, which many men find attractive and even magical.

When a woman uses this technique for several times, it creates the feeling of a flirting game, as if her eyes are trying to hide from you.

When She’s Not Interested: She’ll avoid eye contact, frequently look to the sides or just watch things happening around her. She might look at her nails or check the time.
Her Tonality
When She’s Interested: Her tone will be diverse and usually lower than usual, and occasionally she’ll add the tone of a question, which means she’s looking for your approval. She might talk slowly, and this will subconsciously create a romantic and sexual voice. But she might also talk pretty rapidly and confused, because she’s excited and wants to prevent any “awkward silence”.

When She’s Not Interested: Her voice will be monotonous and boring, and she might add some groans, as a signal of her frustration and disinterest.
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Her Posture
When She’s Interested: She’ll straighten up occasionally in order to highlight her breasts. Sometimes, she’ll do it by touching and pulling her hair. If you’re standing, you might also notice that she’s sending her butt backwards, to highlight it as well. A woman will usually show her interest by leaning forwards.

When She’s Not Interested: She’ll sit with her hands clasped or around the chest, as if she’s keeping her feelings to herself. You’ll see her leaning backwards, and not changing her posture often.
Playing With Objects
When She’s Interested: She’s moving her finger around the edge of her glass, and playing with the drinking straw, fork, spoon, pen, etc.

She can be also playing with her clothes – touching her rings, opening or touching a button, touching her shirt. This all shows that she’s excited around you.

When She’s Not Interested: She is focused on a specific object, and she’s not playing gently or sensually with this object – on the contrary. She might also use this objet to create a gap between you.
Playing With Her Hair
When She’s Interested: She’ll play slowly with her hair, and move it to the side from time to time. This reveals her neck, which is considered an erotic organ, and is usually hidden by her hair.

When She’s Not Interested: Playing with her hair becomes nervous, and is used to let the time pass and deal with her frustration.
Her Face
When She’s Interested: Her face is full of interest. Her eyes are glowing and she’s blinking a lot. She smiles a lot and her smiles reveal her teeth.

Also, a woman who’s interested will bite and lick her lips – and this is an unconscious sign that she might be preparing for a kiss.

When She’s Not Interested: Her smiles will not reveal her teeth, which is a sign that she doesn’t want to reveal her feelings. She’ll squeeze her eyebrows as a response to your words, and her face will lack any expression.
By The Way She’s Crossing Her Legs
When She’s Interested: The legs are far from the brain, and we are less aware of them. Try to watch her legs when you are sitting – if they are located towards you, it’s a good signal of interest. If you are standing – you can see to which direction her legs are “looking”.

You should know that legs are a very erotic and sexual part of a woman’s body. If she changes a lot the posture of her legs, slightly exposing the top of her thighs (remember Sharon stone on “Basic Instinct”?) – it’s a promising signal of interest.

When She’s Not Interested: Her legs will be nervous, and rocking or tapping. When her legs are turned to other directions, for example towards the door, it means she’s looking for an escape from the current situation.
And What If She’s Just Being Nice?
Many men tend to give wrong interpretation to a woman’s signals, and get confused between polite or nice behavior, and sexual and romantic interest.

This happens because men usually don’t pay close attention to small details in a woman’s behavior.

In previous generations (let’s say, until 50-60 years ago), women were expected to be modest and not to express their sexuality. Times have changed, but yet many of the old beliefs about women still exist.

That’s why it’s important to recognize: women who expose their cleavage, or wear tight and sexy clothes, aren’t necessarily interested in being seduced by you. She might be dressing ­like that to feel good about herself or to impress her female friends (yes, it’s also possible).

The fact that a woman agrees to drink alcohol in your company, is also not necessarily a signal of interest.

Also, take into consideration that women naturally tend to be more empathic than men. They also tend to smile and make more eye contact, and the fact that she’s talking with you doesn’t always mean that she has feelings towards you.

In order to be sure about a woman’s intents and interest, you should pay carefully attention to her conscious and subconscious signals. There should be at least 3 different signals, in order to be sure about your interpretation.



]]></description>
    </item>
        <item>
        <title><![CDATA[Afraid of Gay Men]]></title>
		<link><![CDATA[https://okcupid.wodemo.net/entry/536587]]></link>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[@okcupid]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 26 Mar 2021 06:14:54 -0700]]></pubDate>
        <description><![CDATA[Dear Bitter Single Guy: I’m afraid of gay men, but I’m gay.  Funny how it’s come to work out, because I’ve been out of the closet longer than most of my gay peers. Most of my friends are straight.  I do a good job of making people laugh, I actually am pretty decent looking, and I’m smarter than most… but I am petrified of other gay men.
I’ve lately come to joke about myself being a spinster.  Really, it’s got a good sound to it; makes you sound freewheeling, active.  Not at all like what it actually means. But I don’t want to end up a BSG.  Speaking of which; why is a BSG necessarily the one to be giving advice? ~Parsley Pear~

Text and Image Copyright Notice. Published under copyright by Loveawake. © Copyright 2010-2021. All rights reserved.
Dear PP: The Bitter Single Guy is giving advice because he has the brilliant experience of having made nearly all the mistakes already and he’s willing to pass that invaluable wisdom to his readers (and to you). The immediate benefit for you PP, is that the BSG’s infinite experience lets him tell you that you’re not all that unique! Although the twist for you is that you’re a gay man afraid of gay men, there are tons of straight BSG readers who are afraid of the opposite sex or, more appropriately, afraid of their potential for success relating and dating with those nice folks. The BSG is hoping you don’t actually fear your Gay Brothers (and Lesbian Sisters) as if they’re going to hurt you. That’s a different problem.
The BSG is pretty sure that what you mean is that you’re not sure how to approach the whole dating thang within your tribe. The BSG knows that there is as much variability among The Gays as there is among The Straights, so he recommends you not think of your tribe as one homogeneous (pun intended…the BSG cracks himself up) group of scary potential dates. There are undoubtedly other friendly gay men who are similarly shy. You need to find them.
First, you need to get yourself a good old-fashioned gay friend. The BSG recommends, as he does for all his readers trying to get a date, that you start by joining some sort of club. A bowling league or a pottery class; some hobby-adjacent activity where you can safely meet similar folks. Then, just like in middle school, you make a friend, you have some coffee (OK, maybe not coffee in middle school, but you get the BSG’s drift), you laugh and carry on. The BSG isn’t recommending that you date this new friend (although if the vibe is there, go for it), but instead that you allow your new gay friend to slowly introduce you to the fun of hanging out with folks who have similar *ahem* interests.
Therapists call this process Systematic Desensitization, PP. Look that up in Google and you’ll see fascinating references to Little Albert and a White Rabbit and you’ll learn how the Psychological community came to be embarrassed by itself. It’s one of the BSG’s favorite stories.  But bunny rabbits aside, Systematic Desensitization is a great way to introduce something scary into your life in a non-scary way. Good luck, PP. ~BSG~]]></description>
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